Do you need to have the last word in an argument? Why is it so hard to let the conversation die without having the last say? What drives this compulsive need to make the last...
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Category: Communication
Why Won’t My Husband Listen to Me?
One of the common complaints I hear in my office when someone first comes to see me is "My husband does not hear me!" Okay, so let's be honest that it is not always the wife that...
Invitation vs. Expectation
I work with couples regularly who are stuck in the power struggle. They fight with each other over which one is going to act and behave according to the other'sworldview. It...
Marital Fact or Fiction: Our Issue is Communication
One marital myth that I hear quite often in my office is that the root of most marital issues is trouble with communication. It is not uncommon for couples to come in seeking...
Communication…Having the Right Conversation With the Right Person
In therapy, as in life, it is essential to remember that each individual and each relationship is unique. Each story is special. There is no magic bullet, no 'one size fits all...
What’s Missing In Marriage?
What is a common missing ingredient in the couples that frequent my office? It is present in the beginning of a relationship. We heap it on and lavish our new love with it. Then,...
Why Does Your Marriage Lack Intimacy?
Having intimacy in a marriage is not just about having a healthy sexual relationship. There is emotional intimacy as well that is being connected on a deep emotional level. Not...
Unintentional Communication
As parents, spouses, friends, and family members, we often communicate unintentional messages that get us into trouble! To make matters worse, our partners have "guessers" that...
Why It Is Your Spouse’s Fault
There tends to be a lot of finger pointing that happens in my office. "But he did this or you should see the way she tries to control me." It is the focus on what the other...
Are You Being Real In Your Marriage
It seems as though just about every client grimaces a bit when I share this piece of feedback. "People are happier when they can see themselves outside of their relationship."...
Being Vulnerable in Your Marriage May Be Harder Than it Seems
As most brides are walking down the aisle the last thought going through their heads is most likely how difficult it may be one day to open up and be vulnerable with their...
Emotional Anorexia
Most people are familiar with the term anorexia. When they hear the term they think of an eating disorder. People can also suffer from emotional anorexia. I see emotional...
Does True Love Exist?
Does true love exist? Most of us believe in true love to an extent and see it as magical and intoxicating. We associate true love with very powerful feelings, but is that it? If...
Positive Energy is Contagious!
Have you ever heard the phrase, “Being happy is a choice” or “Choose to have a good day”? I’ve recently noticed a trend in “positive thinking” speakers and authors. I agree, we...
Why Couples Can’t Communicate
So many couples entering marriage counseling cite communication as their chief complaint. The problem isn’t that they can’t communicate. The problem is they have stopped...
Are You An Over-Functioner?
Are you tired? Overworked? Overwhelmed? Feel like you can’t stop doing everything that you do or things will just fall apart? You are probably overfunctioning - BIG TIME!...
Why Do We Tell And Re-Tell Our Stories?
Know someone who is constantly telling the ‘stories’ of their life? Or is it you? We often tell our stories in great detail, with all of the drama, the exasperation, the angst,...
Victimy or Validating?
If you don’t know the difference between being a victim vs. validating your partner, you’re in trouble! Knowing the difference determines whether conflicts in your relationships...
Forgiveness ~ The Ultimate ‘F’ Word!
Why should we forgive someone who has hurt us? It feels like the most unnatural thing in the world, doesn’t it? It feels like we will hurt MORE if we forgive, doesn't it? If...
What’s At The Heart of YOUR Marital Issues?
Do you know what’s at the heart of your marital issues? What I’m talking about are the core issues, the deep fears and insecurities buried inside you and your spouse. If you...
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