{"id":3549,"date":"2012-01-29T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2012-01-29T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/truth-and-grace\/"},"modified":"2020-05-11T20:48:45","modified_gmt":"2020-05-11T20:48:45","slug":"truth-and-grace","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/truth-and-grace\/","title":{"rendered":"Truth and Grace"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u2018Truth comes from the mouths of babes.\u2019<\/em><\/strong>\u00a0 Isn\u2019t that old clich\u00e9 so true?\u00a0 Kids can say the most unadulterated, brutal truth with such ease!\u00a0 And when they say it, we don\u2019t take offense to it because we know that it comes from a completely innocent place.\u00a0 There is no ill will behind it!<\/em>\u00a0 It may not feel good to hear (i.e., \u2018you have bad breath\u2019 or \u2018Grandma, your knees are hanging down\u2019), but we know that it is just what they see and nothing more.<\/p>\n

In a relationship, truths are going to come out. \u00a0In fact, if we truly care about someone, the truth needs<\/em> to come out about what we see and how we experience them. If we withhold the truth, we are basically sending them out into the cold, harsh world to figure it out for themselves \u2013 the hard way.\u00a0 That is not loving someone!\u00a0 Yet when we tell our loved one the truth (\u2018you have bad breath\u2019, \u2018you interrupt a lot\u2019, \u2018you come across like a know-it-all\u2019, \u2018you\u2019re very confrontational\u2019, \u2018you\u2019re self-centered\u2019, \u2018that was a pretty dumb thing to do\u2019, etc.) it\u2019s going to hurt.\u00a0 So how do we tell the ones we love the truth with the least amount of pain?<\/p>\n

Truth is best heard when there is no ill will behind it. That means we need to offer it wrapped up in a lot of grace.\u00a0 Grace adds the message, \u2018I know you are a good person and you honestly can\u2019t see the truth.\u2019\u00a0 Further is says, \u2018I know this is going to hurt and I\u2019m sorry, but I care about you and you need to hear it.\u2019\u00a0 This way you gently<\/em> help them to see the truth so that they can be the best person they can be.\u00a0 For them<\/em>, not for you!<\/p>\n

Truth delivered without<\/em> grace is attacking!\u00a0 Offer up the truth with grace by observing the following:<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t wait<\/em><\/strong> \u2013 If you have been withholding the truth for years, it will likely spew out with venom and an angry bite \u2013 and at an inappropriate time!<\/p>\n

Without anger<\/em><\/strong> \u2013 We often voice our truths out of our own pain, but how often has your loved one heard the truth when it is delivered out of anger?<\/p>\n

Without judgment<\/em><\/strong> \u2013 We are all just trying to get along in life and we all come from different backgrounds and experiences.\u00a0 Love your partner by knowing that they are a good person even though they might have hurt you.<\/p>\n

Not for you, but for them<\/em><\/strong> \u2013 When we are speaking the truth for THEM and not for ourselves, that\u2019s when we know our intentions are in the right place.<\/p>\n

Be firm<\/em><\/strong> \u2013 Don\u2019t withdraw your truth at the first sign of conflict.\u00a0 Lovingly offer truth and grace even in the face of their resistance.<\/p>\n

Be gentle<\/em><\/strong> \u2013 No one likes to hear that there is something unpleasant about them.\u00a0 Be kind, gentle, and loving in your voice and body language.<\/p>\n

Allow time<\/em><\/strong> \u2013 Give your partner a chance to digest what you\u2019ve told them. \u00a0If you keep lovingly coming back to it, they may hear you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2018Truth comes from the mouths of babes.\u2019\u00a0 Isn\u2019t that old clich\u00e9 so true?\u00a0 Kids can say the most unadulterated, brutal truth with such ease!\u00a0 And when they say it, we don\u2019t take offense to it because we know that it comes from a completely innocent place.\u00a0 There is no ill will behind it!\u00a0 It may […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[18],"tags":[465,487,488,437,427,424,513,439,514,492,440,499,479,500,429,447,443,515,420,485,516],"class_list":["post-3549","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-marriage","tag-anger","tag-arguing","tag-being-healthy-in-a-relationship","tag-change","tag-conflict-in-relationships","tag-counseling","tag-grace","tag-growth","tag-how-to-tell-the-truth","tag-individual-growth","tag-intention","tag-intimacy","tag-love","tag-marital-conflict","tag-marriage","tag-marriage-counseling","tag-mutual-respect","tag-pain","tag-recovery","tag-therapy","tag-truth"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3549","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3549"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3549\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4177,"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3549\/revisions\/4177"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3549"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3549"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/healingheartsofindy.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3549"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}