Learning how to be alone is an art. It takes patience, tons of patience in fact, but it is so vitally important for good mental health and healthy relationships. If we can’t...
All Alone . . .
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Category: Uncategorized
Fix Them Please!
It's something I hear everyday. "I did not do anything wrong in this marriage, she is the one that had an affair." "He has an addiction and he needs therapy to fix it." "My wife...
To Be Judged
Far too many of us live our lives in fear of judgment - from friends, family, God, even perfect strangers! Why is it that everyone else's opinion of us is so important, in fact,...
Negative Self Talk
“You are so lazy, how could anyone love you.” “You are so fat, how could anyone even look at you.” These are horrible statements that most of us would never say to anyone. We...
Fun Pie Hog
Is your wife or husband a fun pie hog? A fun pie hog, what is that? Well it is exactly what it sounds like. Imagine there was a pie chart designed for your marriage, and it had...
The Spot On the Wall
During parent orientation for college recently, a faculty member was suggesting that we discuss with our students how we feel about them leaving. He wisely knew that most of us...
Mom’s Battery Charger
It’s that time of year again when mothers enter my office with worn smiles, their eyes gaze downward as they confess the horrifying truth: they are ready for their kids to go...
Road Trip
In the midst of packing for my upcoming family vacation, it inspired me to blog about the good, the bad, and the ugly of family trips. I think most of us have some pretty great...
Walk Like a Duck
What is it about codependency that makes it so easy to not see issues that are right in front of our face? Have you ever heard of the phrase, Walk like a duck, and sounds like a...
Be True to Who You Are
Recently on vacation, an opportunity arose to teach our teenage son a valuable lesson. We were fishing for the highly esteemed lake trout and when our son reeled in the first...
Dealing with Abandonment
Abandonment issues can be some of the toughest issues you ever deal with. It is the constant fear of being alone, your loved ones leaving you, or of your partner having an...
After a Fight, Olive Branches Ease the Pain
When couples fight, it is often tricky finding a way back to ‘good’ once the gloves have come off. Both sides are in their respective corners licking their wounds and...
What do you think?
Well, I have this problem and was wondering, what would you do? Can you believe he acted like that, what should I do about that? I don't want to leave her, but she is just not...
The Dumpit List
Everyone has heard of the bucket list, but I’m here to present you with the dumpit list. Dating after a divorce or breakup can be overwhelmingly intimidating for people. Not only...
Now I’m A Friend of Me!
I heard the sweetest words I've heard spoken in a long time today - "Now I'm a friend of me." This, coming from a client who was so lost when I first met them. They were so...
“One of Those People”
I have heard more than one client say something to the effect of “I don’t want to be one of those people!” What do they mean by that you ask? They mean they do not want to be...
The Doormat Syndrome
Codependency can have many different clinical definitions, but for those whose lives revolve around codependency everyday would define it as “being a doormat.” To the outside...
Rewriting the Story
Your life story Oh, this one is powerful! A group member recently mentioned this concept and it just really struck me! The idea is that we all have our 'stories' that we have...
Oh, the Shame . . .
Feeling Shame and Guilt Today I was once again reminded of how ugly shame is. This is not your average, 'oh, I forgot to call my sister on her birthday' shame, this is the...
Everybody’s (Not) Fine
I watched a wonderful therapy movie last night called Everybody's Fine with Robert DeNiro. A movie hasn't hit this deep of a nerve in me in a very long time. In essence, a...
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