Category: Communication

Rewriting History

Rewriting history is when someone recounts certain events, but they spin or twist the facts around usually so that they are the victim of the story instead of having any fault in...

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Blame

Blame

Blame Is Ugly The Blame Game is a trap to keep you in a lower position in life. Blaming says, “there’s nothing I can do about how I feel or respond to this scenario. I have no...

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Applying the Love Languages

Applying the Love Languages

Most clients I have met have heard of The Five Love Languages (by Dr. Gary Chapman), and many even know their own preferences. That being said, some struggle to apply this...

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How To Use Your “Wise Mind”

How To Use Your “Wise Mind”

The human brain has two sides, each of which has an important function. Depending on one’s personality and extenuating circumstances, one side may become more active than the...

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The Power of Saying What We NEED

What you need The power of saying what we need in a relationship is absolutely vital to it's success.  Have you ever had a really bad day? A day where it seemed like nothing went...

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Hailstorm vs. Turtle

Hailstorm vs. Turtle

The Hailstorm vs. Turtle is an analogy created by Harville Hendrix to explain some of the very different ways a couple can behave and react within a relationship. Considering all...

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Boundaries 101

Boundaries 101

Welcome to Boundaries 101! Boundaries are a popular and sometimes confusing topic of discussion surrounding relationships. What is a boundary? How do we set healthy boundaries?...

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Overcoming Defensiveness

Overcoming Defensiveness

  Defensiveness: When individuals feel attacked or misunderstood they often act out in ways to protect themselves. Many individuals get defensive when they are feeling...

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What do you mean by that?

Have you ever been in a conversation where someone smiled, acted polite, and used all of the politically correct phrasing… but something just felt off? Or have you ever said yes...

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Cruelty Masked As Honesty

Has this ever happened to you? Someone offered “helpful advice” that felt like an insult? An employer gives you a performance evaluation, but you left feeling like they want you...

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The Pain Of Projection

The Pain Of Projection

I recently got a vivid reminder of the power - and pain - of projection. Projection is when you project your worst beliefs or fears about yourself onto someone else and believe...

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Instant Gratification

Wow, do we live in a culture that loves it some instant gratification, am I right? I’m reminded of a video I saw once where a gal was going around asking random people on the...

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“It’s Going to be OK”

I had a client the other day remind me of something that illustrates a great point about being a good friend…particularly being a good friend when your friend is in pain for some...

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Anger and Healthy Boundaries

Have you felt strongly about something when you're really irritated, but then forget about that same thing like it was no big deal? Or have a bad thing happen that put you in a...

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Why Do You NEED To Win The Argument?

Why do some arguments never end?  Why do you need to win?  Why do you just have to get the other person to see it your way?  These are the very things that keep many couples...

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Say What You Mean

Say What You Mean

Communication.  It sounds simple and easy enough. More often than not, we don't say what we mean. And most of the time, we don't express what we feel. If you feel you're...

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Boundary vs. Ultimatum

I cannot tell you how many times I have helped folks who have difficulties having boundaries to develop better ones, only to have their spouses get super reactive to those new...

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