Here are some examples of fun pie hogs. One would be a wife who does not work. Her husband works full time, but is also comes home to do many of the house hold chores because she does not do them. He takes care of the yard, taxis the kids around, all while she is out having dinners with friends, wine club, all the while racking up loads of debt onto their credit cards. He is so overloaded with work, house, and kids, if he ever did get a free moment he would most likely have to use it to catch up work that he is behind on or trim the bushes that have not been done in ages.
Another example would be the fun pie hog husband. This is the man that most likely works, but after work (or sometimes even during) he golfs on Monday, bowls on Tuesday, poker on Wednesdays, and do not forget about the guys weekend coming up. In the meanwhile his wife is caring for the house, taking care of the kids, groceries, and any odds and ends issues that may come up. She is so busy taking care of everyone else, if she ever does get a free moment, it is probably used to catch up on some sleep, or to go take care of her mother or grandmother. She expends all of her energy and has none left for her, let alone for her to have fun.
Do either of these scenarios sound familiar in your marriage? If you are married to a fun pie hog, it is quite possible the longer you have been married to this person the more resentful, angry, and bitter you are towards them. You may be at the point where you do not even know how to have fun. This can lead to sadness, isolation, and even depression. So what do you do to work on this? Well the first part of the healing process is to have insight and to understand that you are married to a fun pie hog. You may be so used to this dynamic you cannot even see it for what it is. The second is get therapy! Fun pie hogs are not fun pie hogs to be malicious or mean to their spouses. They are fun pie hogs because generally there is something in their childhoods that makes being a fun pie hog comfortable and appropriate for them and they have been allowed to be fun pie hogs! If you have never been held accountable to share the fun in your marriage, why would you start now? You both need therapy to learn how to reshape and to restructure you marriage.