Do you know someone who uses humor, gossiping, or backstabbing to address their inner anger towards someone else? Triangling like this is when someone is gossiping, judging,...
Triangling – The Devil’s Triangle
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Category: Marital Therapy
The Godfather and Abandonment
Last week, I wrote about the Godfather and the parallels of his life of addiction and real people's addictions, such as addictions that clients often suffer from who seek...
“You Are Controlling!”
Control isn't about typical jealousy you see in a "lifetime" movie. It's being over productive, doing pre-emptively what others are able to do. Being controlling doesn't mean...
Who Are You Really??
Who are you really? The typical answers won’t do here….such as student, wife, mom, daughter, father, owner, employee, doctor, lawyer, teacher, brother, lover, husband, etc. These...
Jealousy……But Why?
Why does negativity stick? Why, when something negative crosses your path, do you feel upset and why does it linger? It seems too often that people define themselves based on...
He Didn’t Know Her
Inspiration is everywhere in the work of a therapist. There is a fair amount of relationship pain that walks into my office. Many wish to have love, acceptance, and...
Family Systems Counseling….it’s not just about your parents!
Our marriage counseling is heavily based on the family systems paradigm. Many of our Indianapolis area married couples who are seeking...
Self-Talk Dictates Your Life
People in Indianapolis seek marriage counseling for many different reasons. Self-talk is a common thing that we work on. Healing Hearts of Indy provides a unique approach to...
“Truth about Abandonment!” Part II
"So, what happens next? How does my abandonment work in my marriage?" What happens next is our defenses kick into high gear. As adults, in our relationships, we can feel...
“Truth about Abandonment!”
Abandonment happens everyday in our lives......it happened in our past and it will happen again. Abandonment is the feeling that says "I did not get what I wanted or needed from...
“Is He Worth Therapy?”
Dealing with someone you love who feels distant, uncommitted, and is possibly having an affair can be gut wrenching and painful. The sting of betrayal, the lousy levels of...
” We Have Communication Issues, that’s all…”
Communication "I know he doesn't care....it doesn't matter if he says he does!" Many times a week, couples will say they are having communication issues. When I probe...
Pain is good…..
"We were doing pretty good until we came in today." I hear this from a couple pretty often, who visit me weekly for marital counseling. She has anxiety and...
He won’t change! She won’t change!
On a recent trip, I looked out the window of my airplane seat and noticed fluffy white clouds and a clear blue sky. Below the massive clouds were cities covered in darkness. I...
Therapy – Time to Get Real!
Feel free to come into my office and vent. Vent all you want in therapy about your partner and how "they do this!" or "they don't do this!" "They make me ..." Go ahead, spew this...
Fights – The Power of Positive Connection
Marriage counselors are constantly witness to couples in great conflict. The fights have increased and it seems that neither one of them can say or do anything without the other...
Courage – The Mysterious Hidden Power Pellet
The word 'courage' came up recently and it has really gotten me thinking: Courage is a HUGE component of recovery! I didn't realize it at the time and I'm only now putting this...
Divorce – Fear of Being “One of Those People”?
I have heard more than one client facing divorce say something to the effect of “I don’t want to be one of those people!” What they mean is they do not want to be divorced....
Counseling – Let’s start at the beginning!
How did I get into counseling? I was born and raised in Indianapolis with an older brother and a younger brother (yes, I do have middle child syndrome). I went to Decatur Central...
Weathering the Storm During Recovery
How To Weather the Storm During Recovery This morning I felt a peace about myself as I got out of my car and, walking into work, heard the birds singing. It’s dead of winter in...
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