Well it IS almost Halloween! Are you aware that you make choices out of fear and worry? OK, are you aware of how many choices you make out of fear and worry? Some choices that...
FEAR…..Muuahahahahahaaaaaaa!
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Category: Self-Help
Wherever You Go, There You Are
There was a story of two men in ancient times of walled off cities. One man left his city and went on a trek seeking a better life. He arrived at a new city’s gates and asked...
What Would You Say To Yourself?
If you could go back in time, say 10, 20, or 30 years, what would you say to yourself? You’ve lived through some rough stuff since then. No doubt, you’ve gained wisdom from...
Take What You’ve Got and Be Thankful
The words stung and then floated off into the universe. I was only in my 20’s, attending a gathering of friends one night when a 4 year old said those seven powerful words to...
The Gift of the Magi
Frantically trying to decide what to give your loved one for Christmas this year? You are not alone. While some people delight in the season of gift giving, far too many people...
How Old Is Your Inner Child?
How old is your inner child? The part of you that is tender, fragile, innocent, sweet, and easily hurt? We all walk around in adult bodies, making adult decisions, holding...
Angry Men . . . Passive Women
Imagine a guy driving his speedboat down the river. It’s a gorgeous day, the water is smooth like glass, and he’s zooming along having a great boat ride. He thinks it’s the...
Who Do You Give Your Power To?
The Story “Not today, Sister!” These 3 words taught me a huge lesson once that will stick with me for life. I had worked for months planning an employee event at my job and I...
Sitting In Your Stuff
”I feel like a crappy husband and father.” This was the response I got from a client recently when I asked him how he felt after seeing the movie, Courageous. I was intrigued...
Mirror, Mirror
When you look in the mirror, what do you see? A good person who is kind, generous, and loving? Do you see a good parent, spouse, son or daughter, employee, friend? That’s what...
Codependency – The Vicious Triangle
The Last Characteristic We have finally come to the last characteristic of codependency, being passive in a relationship. Often feelings of being wronged or used; also called...
Codependent – Other Centered
Learning You Are Codependent Very few people come in to my office, hear that they are codependent, jump up and say, "Wow you are right. Thanks so much my problems are solved!" It...
The Unsexy Side of Therapy – Codependency
You may have noticed how many articles we have on our website about counterdependency, but very little material on its counter part codependency. I've been told that the reason...
Perfection Prison
I am a prisoner of perfection. My cell is fear - fear of saying the wrong thing, doing the wrong thing, writing the wrong words, having the wrong opinion. What is it that makes a...
Therapy – Time to Get Real!
Is Therapy A Place For Venting? Feel free to come into my office and vent. Vent all you want in therapy about your partner and how "they do this!" or "they don't do this!" "They...
Group Therapy is Not Torture!
You should see the look on my clients faces when I suggest they go to group therapy. You would think I asked them to jump into a tank full of sharks with a cut on their leg....
Expectations Part Deux
So we already looked at how many implications the word "expectations" has on relationships. We have looked into how important it is that our partners know what our expectations...
Expectations: Why Can’t He Read My Mind?!?
Implications Expectations... Seems like such a simple word, but the implications of expectations are huge. I hear about expectations practically everyday. "She didn't meet my...
Teachability
It's Hard To Hear The Truth It is hard to hear the truth. Period. No one wants to hear: “You are critical.” “He's hard to talk to.”, “You’re manipulative like your mother!”...
All Alone . . .
Learning how to be alone is an art. It takes patience, tons of patience in fact, but it is so vitally important for good mental health and healthy relationships. If we can’t...
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